A shadowy confession
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A shadowy confession

Biography of a Soul…notes to a seeker.

Like St. Teresa of Avila, whose Abbess instructed her to write her Autobiography of a Soul, creating a map to follow toward the heart of God, I offer a Biography of a Soul, notes to encourage and equip your heart to seek God’s heart.

Like Screwtape to Wormwood, I make practical suggestions about how to continue toward God’s good will. Read on, won’t you?

Mary Cassatt, The Two Sisters, Public Domain


My Dear Seeker,

I often feel so inadequate to be writing to you about the things of the Spiritual Life. I frequently come face to face with my own monumental flaws, flaws that cause dark shadows to be cast on the landscape of my soul. At such times I am tempted to cower in their shade, eyes closed, hands over my face. Cold and accusing, I am convinced that there is no good in me, I am helpless, I can’t even look beyond the darkness of that gloom. I am lost in my pain.

But, I remember God’s truth, even when I don’t feel it. There is hope. Shadows are only cast when there is a source of light. God’s light is shining in me and on me. God’s love is illuminating my life, and it is his kindness that causes my pain. In his light, the contrast between life and death is obvious. My eyes are opened to the times and places I prefer the comfort and familiarity of death. Oh the pain of knowing there is life available to me and I cling to death. Oh, the pain of having to die to death.

How in the world is it possible to step into the light? There must be a way out of the shadows.

Take courage, my soul. The fact that you know you are in the dark is the beginning. Realizing you are living in the shadow reminds you that there is light. Remove your hands from your face, open your eyes, and look toward the light. Remember the feel of the sun on your face, the warmth of the daylight on your skin, and the relaxation you experience when resting in the sunlight. Focus your mind’s attention on the goodness of that light. Choose to remain with these thoughts holding them in your baptized imagination. When you are tempted to avert your eyes from the light and look again toward the darkness, repent. Practice letting yourself choose to stay with the light.

“Turn your eyes upon Jesus, look full in his wonderful face, and the things of this world will grow strangely dim, in the light of his glory and grace.” Helen H. Lemmel

This interior turning is the source of the transformed life. Facing Jesus, choosing Jesus, remaining focussed and intent upon Jesus is the only way into the light. It is a difficult practice to develop, we are bent toward the dark. It requires effort and commitment to stretch toward the light. But I am convinced that this work is our cooperation with the grace of God. When we face the light, the shadows fall behind us and we see only the glory of God.

With you on the journey,

Debby

Choose your Mores
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Choose your Mores

My Dear Seeker,

The evil one subtly lures us into distrusting God by convincing us we need more. If some is good, more must be better. (Reread my last letter for a fuller discussion about this subject.) How, then, does Jesus woo us into believing in and acting from a trusting heart? By using the same motivation, desiring more, but with a different object as its goal.

As I said before, desires are not bad, they fuel our choices, spark us into action, and can lead us to life. It is the goal of our desires that can be deadly. Remember Satan cannot create, so he must twist a God-given goodness into something harmful and hurtful.

Jesus also invites us to desire more. The more he encourages is to have more of God. We are to make choices based on our desire to trust God. This is the more he sought, it is the way of life he invites us to follow.

Every choice we see Jesus making is based on his desire to be united with the will of his Father in heaven. He made the choice to leave heaven and become poor for our sake, fulfilling the will of the triune God. He did not desire and seek after people’s good opinion. He suffered dishonor in the eyes of the world because he desired to live out of the Father’s heart toward humankind. Jesus cast himself onto the care of his Father in heaven. He trusted God for all, his daily bread, his ministry, and ultimately his life and death. He humbly depended on God for everything.

St. Ignatius said it this way: choose poverty which leads to dishonor which leads to humility.  Yikes. Who wants to be poor and dishonored? It is definitely an upside-down world Jesus embodies.

A more contemporary way of understanding Ignatius’ insight is choosing contentment/simplicity which leads to suffering which leads to dependence.  

When we make choices to be content living simply, and doing without certain things, we will suffer to some degree and suffering leads us to God. For example, choosing to ride your bike to work and leaving your car at home. This small but simple choice, made out of love for God’s world, reduces your carbon footprint but increases your inconvenience. Now you must suffer the weather, the time constraints, and the lack of flexibility that driving your car would allow you. You must trust God with your schedule, your safety, and your social calendar.

The starting point of the evil one’s strategy is the lure of riches/more. Jesus’ way of living starts with inviting us into humility. We want humility, don’t we?

Life will bring you many choices. The choice you make will be rooted in what you most desire. Your enemy will attract you toward a choice that will bring you worldly riches and honor. Jesus will attract you toward a choice that leads you to trust God more and to desire the will of the Trinity.

Every choice you make in life has these two options. Jesus would have you choose life.

With you on the journey,

Debby

Desires
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Desires

My Dear Seeker,

To understand the choices we make and prepare to make ones that turn us toward God, we must understand our desires. It is desire that leads to choice. What we want we make choices to get. What we are attracted to, we find a way of moving toward. What we don’t want, we attempt to find ways to avoid. Desire fuels our choices.

There are two competing strategies for attracting our hearts and shaping our desires; therefore influencing the choices we make. The evil one’s and Jesus’.

The evil one’s strategy can be summed up in a word – More. I will be happier if I have more.  If some is good, more must be better. It is only natural for me to work harder to acquire more. More possessions, more influence, more friends, more security, more beauty, more, more, more.

This strategy develops a connection in our mind between what we possess (things, accomplishments, relationships) and our identity. It is tempting to think we are more because we have more; or are less because we have less. We judge ourselves and one another by these measures of success, leading to pride, arrogance, and independence from God.

St Ignatius, founder of the Jesuits said it this way: Having Riches leads to Honor (in other people’s eyes) which leads to Pride.

A more contemporary rendering might be: Acquiring More leads to Success which leads to Independence (Self Sufficiency).

This lie is hard to identify because it is relatively counter-intuitive. Why wouldn’t we want a bigger house if we could afford it? It makes sense to strive for more, working hard to enter that next pay grade so that we can take better care of our family and make sure they are provided for and don’t have to go without anything that would bring them happiness and security.

The wickedest aspect of this strategy is that it takes a good thing and turns it into an idol. For example, wise stewardship. Of course, God would have us consider the financial welfare of our family, the problem comes when we trust our bank account to provide the security that God alone can ultimately provide. We chase the More. We give lip service to trusting God’s provision, but our worrying hearts and anxious thoughts prove we have bought the lie. We say we trust God to provide, but live as if it were up to us and our hard efforts to accomplish the best.

Oh, Jesus, save us from these lies! We’ll talk about his strategy to influence our choices in my next post.

With you on the journey,

Debby

Evil’s Influence
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Evil’s Influence

Biography of a Soul…notes to a seeker.

Like St. Teresa of Avila, whose Abbess instructed her to write her Autobiography of a Soul, creating a map to follow toward the heart of God, I offer a Biography of a Soul, notes to encourage and equip your heart to seek God’s heart.

Like Screwtape to Wormwood, I make practical suggestions about how to continue toward God’s good will. Read on, won’t you?

Mary Cassatt, The Two Sisters, Public Domain

My Dear Seeker,

Following the example of Jesus’ life requires you to cast out demons! (Mark 3) This means you will replace lies that lead to death with the truth that creates life. Although this seems like a hugely complicated ambition, it may be more simple than you imagine. Notice I said simple, not easy.

Jesus is already praying for the ones you love, you are just partnering with his heart for them.

The most important thing you can do to ready yourself for this assignment is to be with Jesus. The first disciples had trouble casting out demons because they had not invested in the work of prayer. (Mark 9:28,29) Every step of your work must be steeped in prayer. You must be with Jesus in order for him to share his authority with you, ask this of him. You must be with Jesus in order for your own heart to be purified so that you seek God’s best for the people you love, ask this of him. Jesus is already praying for the ones you love, you are just partnering with his heart for them. Ask the Holy Spirit to guide your interactions, to give you spiritual discernment, to guard your heart and your mouth. You’ll be better equipped to love wisely and well by being with Jesus.

Casting out demons is casting light on the lies of the enemy. Although we live under the rule of our Lord and Savior, Jesus, the evil one still has influence over our lives, lying to us, and attempting to trick us into distrusting God. The nature of this influence always takes the form of a choice.

From humankind’s beginnings in the Garden of Eden, there has always been a choice. We can choose God and God’s ways or we can choose to turn away from God. The enemy of our soul is constantly trying to convince us that God isn’t trustworthy and we need to take matters into our own hands. This is the ground from which all the lies of the evil one grow.

Uncovering the hidden lie is the work of casting out demons. We begin with our own demons. We must come face to face with our choice to either follow God or to believe the lie that God is not trustworthy and turn away. Living according to the truth rather than the lie means we choose to trust God alone.

Choice is the pivotal action. How do we unmask the subtle (and always inviting) lie of the enemy so that we can make the choice to follow our Lord?  We’ll talk about that in my next post!

With you on the journey,

Debby


The enemy of our soul is constantly trying to convince us that God isn’t trustworthy and we need to take matters into our own hands.

The Nature of Lies
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The Nature of Lies

Biography of a Soul…notes to a seeker.

Like St. Teresa of Avila, whose Abbess instructed her to write her Autobiography of a Soul, creating a map to follow toward the heart of God, I offer a Biography of a Soul, notes to encourage and equip your heart to seek God’s heart.

Like Screwtape to Wormwood, I make practical suggestions about how to continue toward God’s good will. Read on, won’t you?

Mary Cassatt, The Two Sisters, Public Domain

My Dear Seeker,


We’ve been talking about your God-given assignment of going out into the world, announcing the good news, and casting out demons. We’ve established that casting out demons today means confronting and dispelling the lies that the evil one uses to hold us captive to death. We’ve discussed how it is sometimes difficult to identify lies, so let’s talk now about the nature of these lies.


Basically, there are two forces operating in our world and in our lives, the force of God – all things loving and good, and the force of evil – all things anti-God. Make a list of the character and nature of God. For example, God is:

  • Loving
  • Generous
  • Faithful
  • Kind
  • Trustworthy


Now, next to the attribute of God, write its opposite. This is the nature of evil.

  • Loving – Hateful
  • Generous – Selfish
  • Faithful – Disloyal
  • Kind – Cruel
  • Trustworthy – Undependable


Evil is the opposite of God. God is loving and desires our best, evil hates us and wants our demise; God is generous, giving us all we need for life, and evil robs us of life’s necessities. You get the picture.

Job teaches us the tactics of the evil one. Satan (evil in form) constantly roams about the earth looking for opportunities to cause people to doubt God and turn away from trusting God. In effect, to curse God. These attempts are usually subtle and insidious. In our case, they are rarely blatant, as good “Christians” we would never outright curse God, would we? But how often do we question God’s ability or desire to provide?

Even though God’s love and blessing surround us, we are still under the influence of the evil one. We need to recognize the nature of this influence in order to identify the lies. I’ll talk more about this in my next letter.


With you on the journey,
Debby


The process of Spiritual Formation: How the church can aid the making of disciples
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The process of Spiritual Formation: How the church can aid the making of disciples

by Debby Bellingham ⓒ2022

The role of the Church

What does a church community do for the person who wants a transformed life? How does it help promote the process of being transformed into the image of Jesus?

To answer this question, we must first address some foundational issues: What the community looks like

  • Who comprises it.
  • What the leadership of this community looks like.
  • What the community life does in and for the process of transformation.

The community

It has within it a group of disciples on the narrow path, eager to learn to live and love as Jesus. With their best effort, they are committed to God and God’s kingdom and they cooperate with the daily grace the Spirit provides for this process of transformation. This group is the “yeast” of the community, small in number, yet influencing the whole. The sweet fragrance of their lives with Christ invites the rest of the community to walk the narrow path.

The leadership

The leadership of this community is made up of disciples who are personally submitted to this process of transformation; whose ministry is to invite all to join the journey on the narrow path; who prayerfully live in relationship with one another in a way that promotes the kingdom of God through their willingness to sacrifice, their disregard for who gets credit and their commitment to love and belong to one another.

The community life

Being with God together provides discipleship benefits that being with God alone, although necessary and good, does not. In the gathering of the saints, there are relationships that act as mirrors; we can see ourselves more clearly, both the areas of our life gifted by the Spirit for the building up of the body and the yet converted areas that need the transforming touch of the Holy Spirit. Relationships sharpen and purify. Also, being together informs and energizes life for the “non-gathered” days of the week. Strength and desire are gained to live a missional lifestyle.

Community-Aided Spiritual Formation

Having addressed these foundational issues, we can turn our attention to the process by which these gathered disciples and the gathering of disciples aid an individual in the process of spiritual formation.

As Dallas Willard said, “Discipleship is learning how to do what Jesus said (e.g. Sermon on the Mount), learning how to lead one’s whole life as Jesus would, and learning how to act in the power of God, the power of the Kingdom.” We must do explicit spiritual formation training in each of these things. We must develop a curriculum that allows disciples to grow in their ability to live and love like Jesus, to become like Christ in every way.

The church’s primary task

In order for a person to desire to live the life of an apprentice of Jesus, he/she will need to be able to envision a life that is attractive and doable. That is why one of the church’s primary works of spiritual formation is to correct a person’s identity. People suffer from a whole set of identities and we must not add another to their load. Instead, we must help them gain the identity of being God’s beloved child and then equip them to live the whole of their life from this singular identity. The possibility of knowing yourself as loved, accepted, and useful in the kingdom of God is a vision worth pursuing.

Stages in the life of a disciple
Three primary stages of faith in a disciple’s life have been identified at the risk of oversimplifying the process.

  •  Infancy
  • Youth
  • Maturity

Each of these stages has different developmental needs and, therefore, spiritual formation activities must provide opportunities that address the unique requirements of that stage of growth.

Also, these stages do not necessarily progress in an orderly fashion. In fact, movement is more cyclical than linear.

One can even be mature in one area of their discipleship, while still infant- like in another. Although the process of spiritual transformation takes place in a progressive and orderly fashion as the Spirit of God is heeded and employed, the terrain of the soul is not unlike the terrain of our earth – some areas are civilized and others are yet wilderness. It is God’s intention to claim all the territory of our lives for his Kingdom, one area at a time. God’s kingdom and rule progress in a person’s life as the Spirit is allowed access and as obedience follows.

Even though the content of the training in discipleship might vary from stage to stage, there are four elements that must consistently be present in each stage to foster spiritual transformation. With each season of growth, a person will need correct and biblical knowledge; they will need to develop practices that allow this knowledge to be lived out; they will need experience to test the new practices and; they will need relationships to support them as they grow.

Infancy

This term is used to describe someone new to the life of discipleship. Like a baby, they are hungry for spiritual nourishment. They are full of energy and eager to learn and grow; they provide joy and freshness to the community. They need information, education, training, and boundaries to thrive in this phase of their spiritual transformation.

During this stage of the spiritual journey, the disciple would benefit from Christ-like curriculum that taught them the truth of the scripture, gave them the opportunity to study the life of Jesus, and taught them how to read and study the scriptures. Exposure to good and sound writings of the saints of old is helpful during this phase. They should be taught the whole gospel, what they are saved from (death) and what they are saved for (life). It is important that at this early phase of spiritual transformation they explore their identity, recognizing their “false” self and their “true” self. They should develop disciplines of the spiritual life that allow them to practice engaging God through prayer, worship, and study. The sacramental life should also be emphasized, beginning with the Eucharist and Baptism. During this stage of growth, they will need opportunity to practice what they are learning, service projects, both within their community of faith, and outreach to the larger community. Feedback is essential. They will need a group of like-minded people with whom it is safe to process their spiritual journey – its ups/downs, high/lows, successes/failings.

Of course, every church community will need to form means of such equipping as is unique to their style and expression. Below are examples of how some churches have addressed the needs of the spiritual infant among them:

  • Baptism preparation and rite
  • Bible Studies that allow the word to be opened and trusting relationships to be formed
  • Topic-driven classes (e.g. worship, community, prayer)
  • Classes taught on specific books of the Bible (e.g. “Sermon on the Mount”, gospels)
  • Classes taught on the disciplines of the spiritual life
  • Service and mission trips
  • Testimonies shared in a larger group
  • Fellowship retreats focusing on the building of relationships in Christ
  • Recommended booklists

Youth
As a disciple matures in their faith, they will move into a phase of spiritual disequilibrium. They may experience a disruption of their faith in a general way (doubts about God, their salvation, etc.) or in a very specific arena of their life (the Holy Spirit is claiming new ground). The spiritual “honeymoon” is over, and now the loved one is learning to walk by faith, not by sight. Often in this phase of spiritual transformation, the disciple is angry, either at him/ herself, at the church, or at God. The summation of this anger can be captured in the phrase, “You’re not enough.”

The disciple is seeing areas in their life where they are to “put on Christ”; they realize that the narrow way is not a magic carpet. Their trust in God for salvation does not instantly convert them to a perfect follower of Jesus. They have habits, thoughts, and reactions that are not transformed. Disappointedly, they think they are not good enough.

Another young disciple may recognize how much the world needs the good news. There is injustice and oppression in the world and the church is not doing much about righting these wrongs. They rally for a cause and charge God’s community with not caring for the things God cares about. Accusingly, they think the church is not doing enough.

Still, another may face their shadow-side, feel overwhelmed by its immensity and the thoroughness required of the Spirit of God on this narrow road, and blame God for not fixing them immediately. The road is too long, the burden too heavy and they think God is not powerful enough.

The youth brings energy and a prophetic voice to the community of God. They are not content with the status quo – they long for and expect the perfection God promises. Often, during this phase of spiritual development, passion and emotion are the fuel for action or even inaction. The maturing disciple needs this energy and desire to be harnessed for the good of the Kingdom. They need practice in submitting their whole person, minds, wills, and emotions to the Lordship of Jesus; practice in authentic relationships and competency; and always, they need reinforcement of their identity as Christ’s beloved.

It is at this phase of development, that a disciple needs a continued exposure to the patient and unconditional love of God, given in relationship with others on the journey. Opportunities for knowing themselves thoroughly in the context of God’s acceptance will allow the Spirit to bring the light of God’s mercy and justice to their awareness. They need to be useful for the Kingdom, putting their skills and gifts toward a ministry of God’s choosing. They need to discover how to balance their “doing” with “being” and to learn that without a connection to the vine, the branches produce nothing.
Again, each congregation will address these needs differently, according to the graces and temperament of the body, but below are ways some churches have addressed the particular needs of the spiritual youth.

  • Training for leadership
  • · Small group leadership
  • · Compassionate ministry opportunities
  • · Service projects
  • · Small prayer/accountability groups
  • · One/one mentorship
  • · Extended and intensive opportunities to practice the disciplines
  • · Deeper exploration of the kingdom of God (putting into practice the “Sermon on the
  • Mount”)
  • · Spiritual Formation retreats on topics such as anger, worry, lust, etc.
  • · Topical classes (e.g. spiritual warfare, lifestyle evangelism, work as a ministry)
  • · Practice in “putting off the old and putting on the new”

Maturity
A mature disciple is one who is willing and able to live and love like Jesus. This follower has learned to submit to the will and love of God, trusting their whole life to the care of God. They act in response to the nudges of the Holy Spirit and have increasing evidence of the Spirit’s fruit being born in their lives. They live for the glory of God, not their own, willingly admitting their shortfalls because they know they are accepted in God’s love. Their minds have been made new by the scripture, their hearts have been softened by the love of God, their souls display the effect of obedience to God and their bodies are vessels of God’s active love toward the world.

At this stage of spiritual transformation, the disciple needs two primary things: opportunities to give away what has been given to them, reproduction; and retirement. Retirement does not mean a stop of activity, it means a rest from activity, enjoying the fruit of one’s labor, spending time reflecting on the goodness and love of God, to have occasion to further explore the interior landscape of their soul.

These needs can be met by providing them with occasions to share what they have learned of the spiritual life, either through personal relationships or a more formal setting. They need affirmation that they have gifts to offer the community of Christ. They will continue to grow as they give away what God has so generously given them. They would benefit from further exposure to the more ancient disciplines of the Spirit and then be given settings where they can practice these habits of heart – environments where they can become more like Mary and less like Martha; choosing the better lot, to sit at the feet of Jesus and soak up the love.

Ways some churches have of meeting these needs are listed below.

  • Teaching opportunities
  • Leading ministry projects
  • Silent retreats
  • Spiritual direction
  • Mentoring younger disciples
  • Writing about what they know
  • Prayer groups (Lectio Divina, centering prayer)

Conclusion

Abbott Moses taught, “Go, sit in your cell and your cell will teach you everything.” The Spirit of God is able to teach and form a disciple in isolation, apart from a community of believers. Yet, we as the church are invited to aid the Spirit in the teaching of a disciple by creating an environment that fosters spiritual growth and then supplying structures to allow that disciple to progress in the work of learning to live and love like Jesus.

Age is not necessarily a factor in spiritual maturity, although there are life lessons we gain as we advance in years and responsibilities that are useful in the process of spiritual transformation. One can be young in years and wise in the Lord. Or one can be an adult chronologically, yet a baby when it comes to controlling impulses.

The process of spiritual transformation cannot be a program, planned and implemented by a good-intentioned church. It is as unique and as varied as the individual. And this must be recognized by any congregation that desires to be a community dedicated to the spiritual formation of followers of Jesus. It would be much easier to administer a cookie-cutter type program, one size fits all – “follow these steps and arrive at the destination of a mature disciple.” But that is not the nature of discipleship, nor is it even possible. True, there are particular developmental milestones that are universal in the maturation of a person’s discipleship, but these milestones are not predictable in a person’s life, nor are they linear.

One will most likely, need to learn and then relearn these spiritual lessons as they encounter new situations in their life, gain new insight about their souls, or are shown another face of God. As was mentioned earlier, this process is more cyclical than linear.

Because of the unique nature of the individual and the varied speed of progression in the spiritual life, it would be helpful if a community, committed to helping disciples mature in their faith, had a means by which the disciple could “self-identify” their levels of spiritual maturity, indicating areas they feel are the growing edges of their life in Christ. This information, unique to their experience, could then be shared with a pastor or church leader, who could prayerfully, steer them toward the appropriate spiritually-forming events.

This would require much more of a pastoral presence in the life of the disciple; it would be much more effort than just giving them a predetermined course of study. It would mean listening to them, not fixing them; being with them, not speaking at them; holding them; longsuffering with them; knowing them; loving them. It would require of church leadership to live their own lives and love the flock as Jesus did.

Announcing the Good News!
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Announcing the Good News!

Biography of a Soul…notes to a seeker.

Like St. Teresa of Avila, whose Abbess instructed her to write her Autobiography of a Soul, creating a map to follow toward the heart of God, I offer a Biography of a Soul, notes to encourage and equip your heart to seek God’s heart.

Like Screwtape to Wormwood, I make practical suggestions about how to continue toward God’s good will. Read on, won’t you?

Mary Cassatt, The Two Sisters, Public Domain

My Dear Seeker,


You are an important person in God’s plan! You have been given a particular assignment and Jesus sends you into the world to proclaim the good news and cast out demons. (Mark 3:13-15)


Proclaiming the good news – announcing life. Casting out demons – destroying death. Two sides of the same coin. The people you love need the whole penny! Announcing the good news is the first order of business. The flock you shepherd needs to hear your voice telling them of the hope the gospel brings.

Good news is necessary and so needed in this world of ours. Most of us, knowingly or not, live in the conviction that bad news reigns. We look around and see destruction seeming to march in victory. Sure there are little pockets of life-sustaining activities operating in the midst of death-dealing events and circumstances, but they seem the minority, the underdog, the exception.

And when we turn our attention away from the big picture of the world’s situation and look within our own souls, we are even more convinced that darkness and disease have the upper hand. Of course within our souls, there are exceptions to the death principle at work within us (thank you God), but there is plenty of evidence that proves darkness and death still have control over a lot of our thoughts, emotions, and actions. Ask St. Paul. He talked about his own struggle with this conflict in Romans 7. We might despair…

…except for the announcement of the good news – the Kingdom of Heaven has drawn near (Matt.10:7). Hope stirs. “If the Kingdom of Heaven has come near to me, here and now, maybe there is hope. If God has come close, if the power and authority of the rule of God are available, Life has a chance. I can dare to hope that God’s love and power can bring life to death’s outposts in the territory of my soul. Praise our God.”

Which leads to the other side of this coin – the casting out of demons, which I’ll talk about in my next letter.


With you on the journey.
Debby

Being vs. Doing
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Being vs. Doing

Biography of a Soul…notes to a seeker.

Like St. Teresa of Avila, whose Abbess instructed her to write her Autobiography of a Soul, creating a map to follow toward the heart of God, I offer a Biography of a Soul, notes to encourage and equip your heart to seek God’s heart.

Like Screwtape to Wormwood, I make practical suggestions about how to continue toward God’s good will. Read on, won’t you?

Mary Cassatt, The Two Sisters, Public Domain

My Dear Seeker,

In our last correspondence, we spoke of Jesus’ choice and call of you. Your response to his invitation readied you to hear his voice and receive an assignment to carry out in your Kingdom life. He follows up the appointment by giving you a role or title that announces your identity and gives you the authority to carry out this assignment. (Mark 3:13,14a)


You are “mom” to your kids, “wife” to R., “worship leader” to the musicians and choir at church. These names cause others to relate to you with your assignment in mind. They do not determine your value or worth, God’s choosing of you does that. Be careful to not confuse what you do (God’s assignment) with who you are (God’s chosen). Such a mistake would bring death to your own soul and would not bring life to the flock you shepherd in Jesus’ name.


There are three elements entailed in fulfilling this assignment – 1) To be with Jesus. 2) To proclaim the Good News. 3) Cast out demons. (Mark 3:14,15) The first informs your “being”, the second two describe the fruit of your “being.”


To be with Jesus is your essential and elemental requirement. It is the soil from which your life and ministry will grow. It means sharing his life, knowing him intimately, and caring about what he cares about. It requires time and commitment, born out of love, not fear or regulations.


Years ago, when I married Jack I took up running as a wedding gift to him. Running was a part of his life, he loved it. I wanted to “be with him” in the things he cared about. And because I loved him I chose to participate in the activity he valued. Love prompted my choice and even on days when I don’t “feel” like putting on my running shoes and hitting the road, love keeps me committed to the daily training regimen.

Practically speaking, when we are talking about being with Jesus, we’re talking about spiritual disciplines; practices we commit to because we love the Lord and want to share his life. It is love that keeps our discipline in place, not legalism or superstition. Slow down and get in touch with the love that has drawn you to Jesus. Let this love woo you to the mountain so you can listen to the Lord. Your being with Jesus will look different than mine and it may even look different than you imagine. Try not to predetermine what your spiritual practices will be, let the Holy Spirit direct your ways of being with Christ.

And even when you don’t feel like it, let your love of God keep you committed to the daily training regimen of the Kingdom life. Your soul will need the restoration of such disciplines as you go about your God-given assignment.

With you on the journey,

Debby

A look inside is required
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A look inside is required

Biography of a Soul…notes to a seeker.

Like St. Teresa of Avila, whose Abbess instructed her to write her Autobiography of a Soul, creating a map to follow toward the heart of God, I offer a Biography of a Soul, notes to encourage and equip your heart to seek God’s heart.

Like Screwtape to Wormwood, I make practical suggestions about how to continue toward God’s good will. Read on, won’t you?

Mary Cassatt, The Two Sisters, Public Domain


My Dear Seeker,

You have accepted God’s gracious invitation to come away and be with Jesus. You’ve climbed the mountain to sit with him and hear his voice.


His voice speaks love into your heart, acceptance to your soul, loving correction to your habits, all evidence of the good news of the Kingdom come near you! And now his voice offers you an assignment. He appoints you to carry out a particular task, a perfectly suited role for you, your talents, temperament, gifts, interests, and station in life – this assignment has your name written all over it!


The appointment you’ve been given is not necessarily your livelihood (although that would be ideal!) It is the part of God’s heart you’ve been asked to carry. It is the flock Jesus asks you to shepherd. Consider your life. What ignites your passion? What stirs your anger? For whom or what does your heartbreak? These are indicators of your assignment.

A friend of mine likes to ask people “What floats your boat?” This is his way of asking a person about the activities, causes, or people that energize and animate his or her life. Notice what you think about when you are not thinking about anything in particular. Where does your mind wander, this is another indicator of your particular assignment.

You love music – writing it, playing it, teaching it. No one forces you to sit at the piano and play. You are drawn to it, you enjoy it, it challenges and sharpens you. This is the means through which God asks you to share the good news.


Some people’s assignment is not as obvious as yours. My husband, for instance, loves writing screenplays. He desires to write a script that will be made into a movie. This doesn’t seem very spiritual, does it? Except that his writing requires discipline, he must submit to the exercise of sitting at his computer and writing. Such discipline shapes his soul. And his love of the craft has caused him to gather other people who share this affinity. He meets weekly with 10-12 people to encourage creativity and foster relationships. He brings Jesus with him to these friends. They know the love of God through his love of them. That’s his assignment.


We can talk further about identifying this particular assignment of yours, but the best first step you can take is to look inside your heart.

With you on the journey,

Debby

Your Amazing Life!
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Your Amazing Life!

Biography of a Soul…notes to a seeker.

Like St. Teresa of Avila, whose Abbess instructed her to write her Autobiography of a Soul, creating a map to follow toward the heart of God, I offer a Biography of a Soul, notes to encourage and equip your heart to seek God’s heart.

Like Screwtape to Wormwood, I make practical suggestions about how to continue toward God’s good will. Read on, won’t you?

Mary Cassatt, The Two Sisters, Public Domain


My Dear Seeker,


The Lord plans for your life to be amazing, a life that accomplishes and realizes feats of faith and wonder that will astonish even yourself. “We must work the works of him who sent me.” (John 9:4). “We” – a partnership, you and Jesus together. You are invited, in fact, you are necessary to the plan of God. Since Jesus was physically present in creation for only a brief moment in history, the Trinity needs you to bring the spirit and presence of Jesus to creation now, during your brief moment of history.

In Luke 9 Jesus called twelve of his closest friends together and gave them power and authority over demons and disease. He then sent them out into the world to practice what they had witnessed him doing and now had the power and authority to do themselves—proclaiming the Kingdom of God and healing those who needed a cure.

The Trinity has a plan. It is to send Jesus’ closest friends out into the world with the good news. The nature of your intimate relationship with and trust in Jesus makes you one of his closest friends. And the nature of God’s intimate knowledge and trust of you makes you one of the ones with whom Jesus shares his power and authority.

This amazing life of yours begins with Jesus’ call of you and his desire to share his life with you. “He went up the mountain and called to him those whom he wanted, and they came to him.” (Mark 3:13) Jesus called the ones he wanted. His life and his voice filled the air with an invitation to come to him and live. He desired for all to heed his call and come to him.

This invitation has not ceased. Yet, not everyone who hears his voice comes to him; but you, my dear one, you came. Your heart, longing for significance, recognized the call of love in Jesus’ invitation. You are the one he wants. He chose you, you responded. He initiates, you follow. There is such a mutuality in this choice. Both sides of this interaction are significant. You’ve climbed the mountain of obedience and now sit with Jesus, awaiting his voice.

With you on the journey,

Debby

This is Easter!
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This is Easter!

We had just moved into our new condo in San Francisco. I was sorting through the unwanted items the previous owner had left behind under the deck, it was dark, murky, and damp. Some of the boxes, rusty rakes, and clay pots might be useful, the rest would need to be thrown out.

I lifted a box and was surprised when the most beautiful fragrance emerged. The lovely fragrance came from a clay pot. I took it out from under the deck and into the light so I could get a better look at it.

The pot contained a hyacinth. It was pale (colorless, like white asparagus) and since the box covering it prevented it from growing upward, it had wrapped itself around the perimeter of the pot that contained it.

Although formed by the pot’s limits, the darkness and the confinement could not suppress its truth.

I placed the pot in a sunny spot on my deck and within a day, it was transformed. It stood straight, reaching for the sun and it turned a beautiful lavender color. Freed from its darkness and confinement, it could become the lovely flower it was created to be.

This illustrates the power of the Gospel. God created you in God’s image and planted a seed of beauty and truth in you. This is your true self. But, like my hyacinth, your true self has been distorted and hidden by sin.

Jesus’ life, death, and resurrection address the sin that binds you and deforms you.

Let’s talk about sin. Some people have a problem with sin or the word/concept of sin. They’ve come to understand it in a cultural or societal or even a religious interpretation…we are worms, worthless, and there is no good in us.

This is not a biblical picture of sin and its effect on us. Remember before original sin there was original grace.

Dallas Willard says in Renovation of the Heart, “Sin does not make us worthless, only lost.”

Let’s start at the beginning:

Genesis 1 – Humankind was created in the image of God and declared “good.” There is a God spark inside every person that is tended by God. It is guarded and never extinguished like the eternal flame at Arlington Cemetary.

Then, of course, came Genesis 3. Adam and Eve ate of the fruit of the knowledge of good and evil, which God had asked them to avoid, saw that they were naked, felt shame, and attempted to clothe themselves. Sin became incarnate.

Although created in the image of God (good) we also have inherited the image of Adam and Eve (sin). We are sin tainted, it’s in our spiritual DNA, like fat marbled in a piece of meat.

Simply speaking, Sin keeps the hyacinth in the dark, hindering it from being the colorful and beautiful flower it was meant to be.

Jesus is described as the lamb of God who takes away the sin of the world. He purposely entered our world, taking on flesh and bones, and carrying our sin with him when he was killed and placed in the dark, dank tomb.

The dark couldn’t kill the hyacinth and death couldn’t hold Jesus. He rose and now shares his death-less life with us.

Jesus tells us of God’s heart toward us in Luke 15 the prodigal son. (Did you know prodigal means extravagant, spending resources freely and recklessly? I think this parable should be known as the prodigal father!)

“All I have is yours.” This is what the perfect Father says to the not-perfect son.

We are coheirs with Jesus. All that is true of Jesus is true of us by grace. (Gal 4:7)

You see, we are not just good people who do bad things, nor are we bad people who do good things. Take heart! We are beloved sinners.

Like my hyacinth, your true self has been distorted and hidden by sin.

And like my hyacinth, God seeks you, finds you, and brings you into the light so you can stand tall and beautiful.

This is the Good News! This is the story of Easter!